8 posts tagged “family”

I've been gone for a while.  And I've been back for a while.  Still. 

While visiting lovely relatives in Minnesota I somehow picked up a whopper of a sinus/ear infection.  It's been nearly 2 weeks and I am still dealing with the effects.  I took the train home and slept the whole time.  I did take a few meals, but my car attendant was thoughtful enough to just leave me the hell alone and left the bed down.  At least I got a couple of days of rest without too much trouble.  Now, back at home, I am still feeling like crap.  DH is out of town this week (at least I hope he wont catch this crud) but should be home tomorrow.  Funny, I find myself missing him more the longer we are together.  I talked to him today and even got a little misty thinking about how much I missed him.  Maybe it was allergies. 

I did have a wonderful time in Minnesota.  I met some really great people that have been on the periphery of my married life.  Interesting, warm, funny, generous are all words I would use to describe them.  Even though I was showing up at a very stressful time for them.  A death in the family, a child's broken arm, a graduation from college, reliving old hurts.  Even with all of this happening I was welcomed with open arms.  I really feel connected to these people in a way that is hard to explain.  For me anyway.  They are long lost family.  On my husband's side.  And yet.  There is something there.  Something we share.  As I said, hard to explain.  These are people I am very happy to call family.

Over on the other side of the state, things are much the same.  Oldest is a phenom at work.  She is no one's 'yes' man.  She does have a way of telling you that you are wrong and here is why and let's try this instead.  She learned negotiating at a very young age.  She's quite good at it.  Not to mention she knows her 'store' backwards and forwards.  Youngest is just about finished with school, for now.  She is studying Semantics and the Japanese Tea Ceremony.  Not as one class.  he he, that would be funny.  I can imagine her lovely movements as she mixes the tea powder just so and presents the lovely tea cup to a guest.  Did you know that tea ceremonies have been going on for over a thousand years?  Now, that's a ceremony! 

At home the 'boys' Buddha and Bacchus have found that grass hay makes a very warm and sweet smelling place to sleep.  Never mind that hay is about $200/ton.  Makes feeding a bit of a struggle, but I guess it's worth it.  The neighbors have brought in a bunch of new goats.  There seems to be only one survivor of this years' flock.  And chickens with one rooster.  There were chicks running around the other day.  I hope they stay on that side of the fence or they will become chicken mcdognuggets.  

Today I met one of my distant cousins, John Muellerleile, DO from Owatonna.  A very nice man who kindly gave me a few moments to introduce myself and make a face to face connection.  We are a couple of generations removed from being immediate cousins, but the family resemblance is striking.  I hope to be able to correspond with John in the future and maybe even get in one last meeting before I head for home. 

When I was growing up my family named was so unusual that my dad would often make wagers with people that they wouldn't be able to find his last name in even the largest telephone directory.  He would always win.  So, many years  later to find other people with the same last name, people that I didn't know, was very exciting.  When I moved to Washington state, I met a cousin who had just gotten married and was moving to the other coast.  It was a fluke that we got to meet. 

It is very neat to look at family connections through different eyes and experiences, as I get to do with Rebecca.  Her dad is my husband's uncle and from hearing her stories, and those of her mother, I am finally getting some insight to my mother in law who past away this spring.  I wish I had known this history sooner.  It would have made my relationship with her so much easier.  But these are things she kept to herself and never shared.  Too bad.  How much do we hide away from our loved ones because of shame or embarrassment.  Things that are in our lives that we have absolutely no control over, but have shaped our lives none the less.  I know it is hard to b open about some things, hurtful things, embarrassing things, things that were once considered 'very private' things that we will never talk about outside of the family.  But hiding come at great cost, the burden it places on people can be too heavy to carry all alone.  Out of fear, we keep it to ourselves.  How much easier it would be to let the ones we love help us carry the burden.  They will not love us less, in fact, they may love us more.

Today was the day.  Rebecca's commencement.  Approximately 100 people were conferred with Bachelor, Master and Doctorates.  It was a really nice ceremony.  There was a small reception after and we then went to have lunch.  Watching her walk across the stage to receive her hood made me feel a bit inadequate.  Like I need to do this too.  We are so proud of her.  She has chosen a field that is not easy.  She is a marriage and family therapist.  She does crisis work and you can only imagine what that might mean.  The last few years have not been easy, balancing school, work, marriage and two kids, but she did it.  What an accomplishment.  For my two, keep at it.  I can't wait to see Paige accept her Bachelor this winter.  I know it will only be a matter of time before Allison figures out what grad school she'd like to attend.  Even if she waits, it will be worth it.  Remember, Reb just celebrated her 38th yesterday, so it's never too late.

Next week, I am going with Dave to the arts center here.  He does raku ceramics, and he is going to show me how it's done.  I have seen some videos on it, it looks very dangerous, and I am anxious to see the whole process.  He has given me 3 amazing pieces to take home and share.  I can't wait to give them to the recipients. 

I suppose I should head back to the party.  have a good week end all

I had the most amazing experience about a month ago.  Now that dh and I are 'empty nesters' I have a bit more room to spread things out.  The room that used to be our oldest daughter's room is now playing host to my spinning wheel and accessories.  Now, we have lived in this house for about 27 years and there are things that can still surprise me.  Usually it is something that I come across that I have misplaced or quite frankly never even knew existed.  One instance of this was a couple of years ago when we upgraded one of the old twin beds.  Taking the old broken down matress outside and tearing it down so it could fit in the trash I discovered a treasure.  Apparently, many years ago, while she was supposed to be napping, our dear Alicat would slide under her bed with crayons and doodle on the piece of cardboard that was stapled to the bottom of the boxspring.  I had no idea.  Until 20 years had past and it was revealed.  It was like a secret waiting to be discovered.  And so it was a couple of weeks ago when I started using this same room to spin.  I am more of a night person than a morning person, so I stay up quite late and work.  One night as I turned out the light and looked back into the room I saw what had been hiding in plain sight.  A galaxy.  High over head, a galaxy!  Many years before we had bought the glow in the dark stars.  I had forgotten all about them.  You can't really see them during the day, or when the light is on.  They kind of disappear.  Until you turn off the light.  Oh!  What a beautiful surprise.  Thank you Allison.  You've surprised me again!!

I am done.  Tying that is.  The wig is going through final rinsing after being dyed the final 'correct' color.  It is for the character 'Akuma' from Street Fighter.  I will have to figure out a way to straighten the yarn.  I'm thinking about ironing under a bit of tension.  Or maybe getting a cheap 'hair straightening iron'.  I don't know.

Now that I am done with wig assembly I am thinking about building a small simple loom for my project.  That would mean starting over, which I often do.  I am not happy with how the original weaving looks, and I know I can make something better.  It will have one rigid heddle and be on a simple frame.  That should help it go a bit quicker once every thing is set up.

Bacchus is settling in nicely.  Tomorrow he goes for his "well check" that the Humane Society provides.  I am wondering how much weight he has gained since last week.  He is holding his own and then some.  We had to do some "yard" adjustment to keep him in the fenced area.  It is a little over an acre, but a determined little dog could easily slip through some places if not watched.  I am so used to giant breeds that it is taking some getting used to the smaller dog, although from the looks of his paws he should finish out at about 60-80#.

My youngest sister just got back from visiting my oldest sister in Tennessee.  The drove to Florida to do some family research.  My maternal g'parents are interred at a cemetery in northern Florida.  We are having some trouble with my maternal g'father's family history.  We do not know his mother's maiden name and records are scarce.  Could he have been illegitimate?  Maybe.  We just don't know.  I remember talk when I was younger that he had been adopted but that has never been certain.  Maybe when I see my mother this month I can find out something.  There has always been some reluctance about sharing family history from this side of the family.  I don't know if there is a family 'secret' that doesn't need to be or if my mother's family just never had any interest in this type of thing.  Seems odd to me.   Although things we now consider to be of little scandal value were thought very shameful 50 years ago.  Children out of wedlock these days is almost 'normal'.  I guess I'll find out soon enough. 

I know that it will be 100 degrees F here tomorrow, but some geese just flew over honking so can fall really be that far behind?  The county fair is over, school started today and Labor Day is fast approaching.  I like fall here, but ever since the solstice, you could feel time growing shorter. 

But fall is coming, so I'll try to plan ahead.  I got some dried hibiscus flowers, powdered black walnut hull and some dried elderberries the other day, so I will do some experimental dyeing, playing with mordants and afterbaths.  Work continues on the level 3 book.  All in all about 45 10yd skeins of different fibers and blends.  I have about 7 done so far.  I know that silk noil can be pretty, but all the trash you have to pick out is annoying.  I did a 50/50 blend with cotton today and it is lumpy bumpy scritchy scratchy.  But on the good side, today my copy of the Silk Worker's Handbook by Cheryl Kolander arrived today with loads of great information.  When I was up in Gibson's Landing I was also able to get the revised Peter Teal book on wool combing. 

I have been designing a distaff for flax in my head the last couple of days.  I was thinking about using an old bamboo umbrella, just take off the skin.  But I want something a little smoother than the few I have seen.  I may use some of my wisteria stems lashed to a dowel with a nice finial on top to tie the strick to.  Haven't quite decided.

I talked with my dad yesterday about what is happening with his brother's estate and my aunt.  He said there is really nothing we can do.  But I'm pretty sure my sister will be keeping an eye on things.  For my aunt's sake, I hope so.

I think Allison comes home today from the Big Island where she was keeping her g'parents company.  Sounds like some work got done on Walt's book.  We got a lovely picture emailed of DH's paternal grandmother when she was a young lady taken in 1919, 3 years before Tom's dad was born.  She is sticking out her tongue at the camera.  Amazing how much the pose reminds me of Allison!  We have another photo of DH's paternal grandfather and you would think it was DH in one of those photo booths were they dress you in period clothes.  They look almost identical, except Tom's g'pa went bald in his 50's and Tom will not.

Minnie tongue out 1919

1 comment

Isn't she charming!!  Who could resist?!!

I got some disturbing news this evening.  Last week one of my uncles died.  He had just turned 90 and was in poor health, so it was no great surprise.  I hadn't seen him for many, many years.  One of my sisters, however, lived near him and my aunt and would check in on them quite often.  There own children, my cousins, and their grand children live farther away, but not so far that a couple of hours driving would have put them right there.  Now I find out that my 87 year old aunt, who is profoundly deaf, can hardly see and may or may not be surffering from dementia is on  her own because my brilliant cousin told my sister to cancel the meals on wheels and not to put any death notice in the paper because he doesn't want people to know she is all alone.  Then, instead of leaving my uncle's ashes with my aunt, as was her preference, he decided to take them with him to the town he lives in for interment.  Now, my cousins are quite a bit older than I am, but I gotta tell you, I think they need a good as$ kicking.  I am sooooo angry.  Hopefully my sister will call the county elder care folks and let them know.  Grrrrrrr.  

I don't know how many of you remember that Dionne Warwick song.  I was a kid when it came out and we lived about 30 miles or so from San Jose.  Well, next week DH and I are returning to our old stomping grounds.  We will be attending his family reunion in Watsonville, CA which is about 40 miles south of SJ.  Hopefully we will be able to pack up some fresh artichokes and saltwater taffy to take home.  Watsonville and surrounds are prime artichoke growing country.  Nice sunny days tempered with morning and evening fog from the Pacific ocean. 

Close by are the cities of Santa Cruz and Monterey.  I'd like to visit  both.  Lot's of good memories of our "courting days" are wrapped up in those two places.  Two kids with little money and lots of hormones!! We'd get in the truck and drive down to the beach and spend the day at the boardwalk and lay in the sun and dip our toes in the cold ocean.  One time we saw two men that must have sunbathed everyday of their lives.  Their skin was massively wrinkled and nut brown.  After seeing that, I was much more careful about sunbathing.  That was more than 30 years ago.  And I was a huge sun worshiper back then.  Baby oil was my tanning aid of choice. 

One thing I am not looking forward to is the bloody plane trip.  I always feel like a sardine in a tin.  At least the flight is not over long. 

I also hope to visit my mom.  She will be 75 this year and lives alone, by choice.  She and my dad split (though not divorced) years ago.  She still lives in the house they bought back in 1952.  It is worth a fortune now.  It seems to me she is turning into my grandmother.  My grandmother was basically a hermit (hermitess?) after my grandfather died of a massive heart attack at the age of 62.  My grandmother lived over 20 more years waiting to join him.  My mother is an intelligent and attractive woman, yet she prefers to keep to herself.  I don't think she has much use for me, but she adores my husband, so we will stop by to see her.  I hope I don't end up being that negative and unhappy over the next 25 years. 

Anyway, enough about that.  Time to start packing.  We leave tomorrow for Seattle and we are looking forward to seeing our oldest daughter Allison.  We haven't seen her since Christmas (wow, has it been that long?) and she will meet us in Seattle for dinner.  Can't wait to catch up.  And after we get back Paige, our youngest, is driving over to spend a day or two with us.  How lucky am I?  I get to see my two beauties!!!  They have grown into the most beautiful and interesting people.  How did Tom and I do that?? 

Cheers everyone.  Hug each other, and as Bill and Ted say "Be excellent to each other and party on"